The Happy Moron

I’ve seen this movie before, but the last time I saw it, it was made in 1961 and titled “One Eyed Jacks”, starring Marlon Brando.

“If Hollywood remade this film for 2009, it would star a good looking piece of meat who couldn’t act as the lead. The sex would be explicit, the blood would flow more freely and there would be explosions. I suspect the 2009 “One Eyed Jacks” would be similar in feel and quality to “The Italian Job” – a run of the mill action/adventure film with some star power but nothing to raise it above the ordinary.”

Let’s run through the checklist, shall we?

• 2009 (You can probably buy a 2009 vehicle right now, so I’ll claim this as a win.)
• Stars a good looking piece of meat
• … Who can’t act (I saw little evidence of acting from Daniel Craig. In fairness, he’s better than Mark Wahlberg)
• [Missed] The sex is explicit (I’m happy to say I was wrong on this. No explicit sex)
• The blood flows more freely
• There are explosions (What was the last action film without them?)
• Similar in feel and quality to “The Italian Job” (Subjective, but for me a resounding “Check”)
• A run of the mill action/adventure film (I couldn’t say it more concisely)
• Some star power (Not too much, just a little: Dench & Craig)
• Nothing to raise it above the ordinary

Hmm… We have a tortured dark bad-boy hero film here. In fact, I think I’ll just rip off most of my previous review of the film…

“There’s not a whole lot to set this film apart from your average tortured-dark-badboy-hero film. I’ve no complaints about the acting, and the script-writing holds its own. There’s even one or two lines I’d quote for cheesy cliche value. Overall, “One Eyed Jacks Quantum of Solace” is quite enjoyable to watch, although I’d hesitate to say I was captivated.

There’s a reasonable amount of intrigue, a reasonable attempt at romance, and a reasonable hideously overblown dose of gun-slinging punctuated with explosions and ridiculous stunts.”